Tips and Tricks for Bridesmaid Dress Shopping

When it comes to shopping for bridesmaid dresses, etiquette is crucial to keeping positivity high and wedding stress levels low. That goes for both the bride and her bridal party! From figuring out what to wear to bridesmaid dress shopping to finding colors and styles that are flattering and suitable for the wedding theme, there’s a lot to carefully balance along the way. With that in mind, Avery Austin’s generated helpful bridesmaid dress etiquette guidelines for both brides and bridesmaids to consider, as well as some general tips for the bridesmaid dress shopping day. Let’s create a fun and happy experience for everyone involved in choosing the bridesmaid dresses right from the start!

What is the Etiquette for Choosing Bridesmaid Dresses?

Proper bridesmaid dress etiquette is all about being respectful, supportive, and communicative, and that goes both ways between brides and their bridal parties. Wondering what that looks like when it comes to working together to shop and choose bridesmaid dresses? It might involve a lot of advanced planning and decision making on the bride’s part, as well as an open mind and flexibility from both sides. Below is a list of suggestions for ways the bride can follow bridesmaid dress etiquette followed by a list for bridal party members too.

Bridesmaid Dress Etiquette for the Bride

• Do your research in advance. This might mean gathering inspiration and creating your wedding day vision for what you think the whole bridal party should look like when grouped together. Before bringing the rest of the bridal party on board with their ideas (which could overwhelm you or steer you away from what you truly desire), it’s important to make some initial decisions yourself first. Scrolling through Pinterest or Google or picking up a few bridal magazines, for example, can help you develop at least a general idea of the color schemes you like or silhouettes and dress features you find most pleasing to the eye. You can also start browsing bridal blogs for helpful tips on how to pick a bridesmaid dress color or style. Start gathering intel with the following Avery Austin blogs: Should All of My Bridesmaids Wear the Same Color? and Should Bridesmaids Wear the Same Dress?
• Be clear about expenses from the start. Everyone is on a different budget, so it can cause a lot of anxiety for the bridal party if they aren’t sure how much a gown, alterations, and accessories might cost. Be open about discussing budgets individually with each bridesmaid to see what they feel comfortable contributing. From there, you can make plans to either shop within the bridal party’s price range, check out sales, or prepare yourself to offset the cost of a more expensive style.
• Shop early. Shopping for bridesmaid dresses early means there’s plenty of stress-free time for bridesmaids to get measurements done, dresses ordered, gowns altered, and accessories purchased before the big day. How far in advance should you go bridesmaid dress shopping? It’s best to order around 6 months in advance, so shopping even earlier to give you and the bridal party time to decide on the style(s) is key. Finding yourself on a tight timeline? In that case, it’s best to shop at places that have bridesmaid dress styles in stock and available to ship right away or places that provide a shorter turn around time for their special order items. Avery Austin’s collection of bridesmaid dresses offers the best of both worlds! With many styles and colors in stock and ready to ship and others with estimated shipping dates at around 2 months, Avery Austin makes shopping for bridesmaid dresses on a timeline a whole lot easier!
  
• Consider shopping with a small group first if you have a large bridal party. This might mean bringing along your maid or matron of honor, your BFF, or mom for an initial bridesmaid dress shopping experience to give you time and space to think through what you want for your bridal party vision without the thunderous noise of a dozen or more opinions all at once. After you feel more comfortable and confident with the colors and styles you like for your bridesmaid dresses, shopping with a larger group or with the rest of the bridal party at a later date might feel less overwhelming for everyone!
• Be flexible whenever possible. When so many different people come together, there’s a lot to balance. From budgets, colors, and styles to body types and skin tones, it will be impossible to please everyone 100% of the time, but a certain amount of flexibility can go a long way to keeping the peace between you and your bridal party. If you know you’ve got a college student in your bridal party, for example, you might want to find a discreet way to help her cover some of the bridesmaid dress shopping expenses. Know you have a lot of bridesmaids with cool skin tones? Maybe skip over those warm reds and oranges you were considering for a fall theme and go for cool-toned versions of the shades instead. Find areas where you can be flexible because these cherished bridesmaids are important to you too!
• Keep your wedding dress in mind too. This idea gets overlooked often, but it’s important to consider how your wedding dress will look when surrounded by the chosen bridesmaid dresses. Do you want certain features to coordinate for a harmonious look or do you want your gown to really pop and stand out as different in all of the photographs? Explore the possibilities in this Avery Austin blog about matching bridesmaid dresses to your wedding dress.
• Shop online. Times are changing, so the traditional trip to a bridal salon for an appointment with the girls is not always the most convenient or cost effective option anymore. More and more brides are shopping online with trusted bridal shops because they can easily shop bridesmaid dresses from their own homes in comfy clothes whenever they want. Many online shops also save you money in the long run because they don’t have all the extra expenses a physical store location has, and those savings show in the listed gown prices. Feeling wistful about that time-honored gathering though? Not to worry! Avery Austin’s Try at Home Program works for bridesmaid dresses too! Simply select up to three styles per box for your bridesmaids to try on, then set up a time for everyone to get together in the comfort of your own home (or a bridesmaid’s home). Break out the bubbly and put on a fashion show together among friends without the stress of appointments and crowded salons.

Bridesmaid Dress Etiquette for the Bridal Party

• Be flexible about colors and styles. Maybe you wouldn’t normally wear something strapless or in a certain hue, but give it a try! You might find something new to love while bridesmaid dress shopping. Even if the chosen gown is still not your favorite, remember that it is only one day for you but a lifetime of memories for the bride, so consider what aspects of the gown you can be flexible about and what you think you need to politely speak up about because it is a hard “no” for you comfort or budget-wise.
• Follow the bride’s guidelines. This is especially important if the bride is allowing her bridal party to mix and match their bridesmaid dresses. Whatever rules she sets about the color, fabric, features, or designer, stick to it when you’re shopping for a bridesmaid dress! Support her wishes for her big day and avoid a confrontation later that is sure to upset both of you.
• Be constructive, not critical. Okay, even if that is the most hideous shade of yellow you’ve ever seen in your life, let’s find a more respectful way to make it clear that that particular hue will do nothing for the bridal party, the wedding photos, or the overall wedding aesthetic. In this scenario, there might be less tragic hues worth suggesting or a polite discussion about skin tones and universally flattering hues might be in order. Whatever the situation that comes up, remember to lean toward helpful commentary rather than critical assessments. Making your bride defensive will not help you sway her to your point of view when it comes to bridesmaid dress shopping.
• Stick to the timeline. Don’t make the bride chase you down and nag you about ordering, fittings, alterations, getting accessories and shoes, etc. If she has already provided you with set dates for getting things done, make sure you stay on top of your tasks in a timely manner. If you’re not sure when you need to place your order or how long alterations take, don’t hesitate to ask for the bride’s opinion. Whenever possible, take the initiative to get things done and take that small part off of the bride’s task list.
• Get measured. Don’t automatically go with your usual size or take a guess at a size or two up from the norm because you heard bridesmaid dresses run small. Get measured and check the sizing guide for the exact gown you need to order for the best results. This will save you time and money with regard to alterations and keep the bride from getting stressed out when you need to exchange for a different size. Check out Avery Austin’s helpful video on how to take bust, waist, and hip measurements on this Size Guide information page. 

General Tips for a Bridesmaid Dress Shopping Day

The day has come for you and the bridal party to go bridesmaid dress shopping or to try on bridesmaid dresses at home. Here are some general tips that can help keep the peace when shopping for and choosing bridesmaid dresses:

Tips for the Bride…

• Choose your group wisely. If you know some bridesmaids won’t speak up in groups or others have strong critiques about everything, shop separately with them for everyone’s peace of mind. If some bridal party members live far away, see if you can loop them in digitally, especially for a try at home session! Whatever your reasons, it’s totally okay to not have the entire bridal party with you the first time when you’re trying to narrow down the style options.
• Give clear style and color expectations or provide the options you’ve selected. If you’re hopping on the mismatched bridesmaid dress trend, make sure you’re clear about the color or style you prefer and from which designer (since these things can vary dramatically by designer). On the other hand, if you have a set idea of the type of bridesmaid dresses you want for your wedding, provide the bridal party with the specific options you’ve preselected for them to try on (which is super easy to do with Avery Austin’s Try at Home Program!).
• Express yourself clearly and kindly. At the end of the day, it’s your wedding and your choice, so it’s okay to disagree with a certain style or color that some of your bridesmaids might want. Just take the time to be polite about it, then shift the group back to your preferences for your big day and see how they can help you bring that vision to life.

Tips for the Bridesmaids…

• A positive mindset is key. Prepare yourself to have fun, no matter what styles or colors the bride chooses. Think of it as a day out with the girls!
• Choose undergarments wisely. When it comes to figuring out what to wear to bridesmaid dress shopping, we often forget to consider what’s underneath our clothes. Pick undergarments that are comfortable and appropriate (especially if seen by other bridesmaids, the bride, or a salon attendant). Pick a bra that could work with a variety of necklines or bring along a few options to change into if needed. Think you’ll be wearing shapewear on the wedding day? Wear it when trying on bridesmaid dresses too!
• Wear simple clothing that’s easy to slip on and off. This is probably the number one rule to keep in mind when deciding what to wear for bridesmaid dress shopping! After all, chances are you’ll be trying on multiple dresses, so having clothing that’s easy to remove and put back on will save you a lot of time and effort.
• Consider bringing two pairs of shoes: heels and flats. You can get a better sense of how the dress might look in heels or flats if you’ve got both on hand to compare. This can go a long way to helping you get the bride on your side too if you have a strong opinion about wedding day footwear.
• Skip the jewelry and fancy hair clips. Pulling all of those dresses on and off makes it easy to snag jewelry and hair clips when you’re bridesmaid dress shopping. Some of the most popular wedding fabrics, like lace and tulle, are super prone to snags and pulls, so when you avoid wearing anything that could get caught in the fabric, you’re helping to preserve the sample bridesmaid dress styles too.

Whether you’re a bride getting ready to shop for bridesmaid dresses with her bridal party or you’re a bridesmaid getting ready to choose your bridesmaid dress, so long as you remember to communicate early, kindly, and often, you’ll be setting yourself up for a successful experience. That’s really what bridesmaid dress etiquette is all about, and now you’ve got all the tips you’ll need to be a pro at it.